The Crazy Train by Ryan Fu (The Hated Ones)



It’s a little past midnight when I was about to call it a night but then I get a call for Britney. Supposedly, she came down from the mountain heading to the valley. I thought it was another wack ass fake tip but I decided just to check out to make sure. For last couple of months Mrs. Spears has been all over town doing insane things but for the last couple of weeks she’s been in hiding. Maybe she wanted to make us believe she had calmed down but it was not the case this night. I take a drive on Mulholland Drive up to The Summit and noticed the night crew was not there, parking my car on the side of road making a couple of calls to figure where she was then Arturo shows up in his brand new Jaguar, which is not so new after a couple of Britney follows as the transmission is already gone to shit, the brakes probably needed to be changed weeks ago and the smell from all the fast food wrappers from all the stake outs has a worse smell then an actual garbage truck.

But it didn’t matter to him because he could afford another expensive car because during the Britney days, the money for the shots were so ridiculous that you would do anything to get those photos. From large SUVs to exotic European automobiles, the cars from all those Britney chases looked like car extras from the Fast and the Furious. He tells he she’s already on the other side of the valley and the guys are on it, so I jump in his shit with my gear heading to the hunt. He tells me she’s been out for the last twenty minutes and we need to catch up to the pack. He drives like a bat out of hell, swerving down to the valley as he gets a location of where she was in the valley. Apparently, she was with her manager, driving like a maniac trying to get away from us, which is never a good for us or other drivers on the road.

We are minutes away from catching up to the pack when Arturo gets a tip that a bunch of paps have been caught by the cops for speeding, but they didn’t stop Britney. So, he slows down a bit making sure we don’t get caught up, as minutes later we see a gang of cops pulling over a bunch of paps on Sepulveda Blvd with their backs against a chain link fence being questioned by the cops. We quietly pass them as Arturo finally spots the infamous white Mercedes as continue the hunt. We try to drive normal hoping to not raise any suspicion to Mrs. Spears. Although, she was still driving erratic as we try to figure out her next move.

We’re still in the valley as Arturo spots a notorious Britney hangout, the grocery store. He drives past her making it look like we were just normal stoned dudes, who needed to go to the grocery store because we had the munchies. Arturo pulls into the Ralph’s parking lot as we can see the Britney followed right behind us trying to find a parking spot. We do a couple of loops until Mrs. Spears found a spot getting out of the car with her manager heading to the grocery store. We decide not to shoot her going in as we wait until she finally walked into the store. We park the car feeling a bit astonished that we were the only one there following her. But it was short-lived as paps start to arrive at grocery store like bloodhounds finding her scent. All of us wait at the exit like a couple of hungry wolves waiting for our meal. We see her in line with her manager with a basket full of groceries looking like she was about to prepare a Thanksgiving meal for a small army. We saw our opportunity and took it, storming the Ralphs blasting Mrs. Spears while she was checking out.

Amazingly, as we were flashing the shit out of her none of the patrons or the store employees thought it was odd. They just acted like it was totally normal that two people were getting photographed at a grocery store like it was a runaway show. She finally checks out proceeding to get out the store as we continue to shoot her as she smiled and giggled for us like a school girl right after school. When we reach the parking lot there were actually fans of hers waiting and trying to get autographs from her. I push them to side trying to get more shots but they weren’t going to be denied as they wanted to meet the Princess of Pop. She graciously obliges them by posing with them. I finally had enough of shooting her feeling like a stuffed lion. I just looked at the controlled chaos that was surrounding her as she tired to act like a normal woman trying to get groceries past one o’clock in the morning. She finally gets back into her car with her manager as we run back to Arturo’s car to continue the hunt.

We all start following her again but not as crazy like before because we already got our shots which were great, so good that it could have probably fixed the transmission on Arturo’s brand new Jaguar. While in the car he tells me she was probably going home, which he was right again as she pulled into her compound. We pull on the side of road down Mulholland Drive to check out our photos and video. Once again, I was about to call it a night when Arturo tells me she’s probably going to come out again. I tell him to stop fucking with me but then in the corner of my eye I see the infamous white Mercedes passing us heading down Mulholland Drive. I know who I was dealing with but I was totally shocked and amazed that she came out again. I mean where the fuck is she going to past two in the morning. As we follow her again in the dead of night wondering where she would take us now. 

This time she took us into Hollywood going towards Robertson Blvd, which is called Paparazzi Alley because it’s where the Ivy and a lot of trendy shopping stores that many celebrities like to shop. Naturally, all the stores were closed including the gas station as I thought for fucks sake where was this girl going? Then after a couple of laps up and down Paparazzi Alley I see the store manager of Kitson opening up his shop for Britney. She parks right in front of store as we all get out of cars shooting her once again pretending like we didn’t just shoot her thirty minutes ago. She and manager get the run of the store all by themselves as we shoot her looking and trying out clothes. The word has spread that she came out again as the freaks with cameras were coming out of the shadows. As our small gangbang became larger and larger as the store manager tells us that this was totally normal for her.

I thought about what he said as I looked at all the freaks at the window taking photos of Britney trying to be normal girl shopping for clothes at a time where normal people usually slept. Did I also mention this was not the weekend, it was the middle of the week when this shit is all going down. I thought what at any point of this whole night resembled any kind of normalcy. These are not actions of a normal grown human being even with the all media attention she was getting, this was outrageous by any standards of a public or private figure. But as savages we don’t think about that because our job is to report the news no matter how insane or how disturbing it is. So, we keep on shoot as she grabs bags of clothes to her car, proceeding to another a store which is kindly opened up just for her to shop in. 

We continue the process of following her then shooting her inside of the store. In the middle of it I start to breakdown, I couldn’t shoot anymore or I did not want to shoot her unless she did something different. I waited as the rest of the animals continued on with the media assault of her as she pretends to be a normal girl shopping on Paparazzi Alley trying to not get any attention from media keeping a low profile. Naturally, she was failing at it and maybe we all were because we were part of the problem. But it was not that kind of night trying to fix the world’s problems. It was just a normal night with a normal girl doing normal things followed by grown men with cameras. It’s past three in the morning when she finally stops her shopping spree heading back to her car. We do the dance again one last time running back to our cars following her in the dark. Arturo tells me once again she probably is going back home, which I prayed to the gods she did because I was getting really tired and I was starting to lose what little mind I had left. Luckily, she went back home again as we pull into the side of the road next toMulholland Drive.  Before, Arturo says anything I grab all my things getting out of the car, as he tells me as I walk to my car she’s probably going out again but I didn’t care. I’ve had enough of her and the freaks. I just wanted to go home and sleep, which I didn’t care if I even uploaded the photos because I was so tired. 

As I make my way to my car I could hear the sounds of cars starting up, as I hear walkie talkies chirping that she was coming out again but I’ve made up my mind about going home. I’ve had enough with the craziness and the freaks as I see the infamous white Mercedes again drive past me along with the money train going down Mulholland Drive into the unknown during the twilight hours. I say a quite pray in the dark for the hunted because there is usually no mercy from the hunters, as I put an end on this fucked up night but it wasn’t going to be the last crazy night with her unless she actually decides to act normal, which could mean the end of these insane nights. 

Secretly, I didn’t want it to end because I know it’s fucked up but it’s a great ride to be on, which you can only ride it once in your lifetime. In the end, we regret all things we should have done because we were too scared. I just hope I don’t have those regrets as I enjoy this crazy ass ride called life or something like it.




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Poetry Mondays – Great Expectations by Ryan Fu (The Hated Ones)



I am going to let you down.

Not because I want to,

it’s because I have to.

I have to be better,



than anyone else because

you want to see me fail. 

I know you want to look down on me

with your arms raised high to the Gods,

hovering over me

like you won life’s race

but you didn’t.

This is a marathon,

a dog fight,

where I embrace the Grind

putting my head down,

biting my on mouthpiece.

A world filled

with high school counselors,

misjudging me,

telling me my future,

but you’re not a fortune teller

because I control my destiny.

I am ready to write my own story.

I am ready to fail.

I am ready to disappoint you.

I am ready to be great.

I am ready to die.

Are you?




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Poetry Mondays – Legends by Ryan Fu (The Hated Ones)




As a kid,

I’ve always wanted to capture

a dragon

but I wondered what

would I’ve done

if I actually caught one?

So day in


day out

I eat


take shit

with a smile on my face

just for the chance to write

my own story.

Because isn’t that the only reason

why we do anything?

Why we abuse


torture ourselves,

until we are halfway to our graves.


We want to be remembered.


We want our words



to live on past the afterlife

making us immortal.

We are tired of not being the narrative

because we want to stand out.

We want to become heroes

in our own story. 

So, I remain steadfast

with my pen


my balls

waiting for the opportunity,

still chasing that dragon.

Photo Credit: Andy Fair Hurst




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Poetry Mondays – A Rat’s Courage by Ryan Fu (The Hated Ones)



The thing about the truth 

it needs someone

to tell it



to hear it.

Somewhere in middle

it stays in limbo


the believable


the unbelievable.


has the potential 

to save,

to inform,

to protect,

but more then anything else

the POWER to cause PAIN.

I heard once 

to tell the truth

even if it lead to your death,

but what about if it lead 

to other people’s death? 

Courage does not 

come from telling

the truth,

it comes from

dealing with

its consequences. 

How many eggs 

are you willing 

to break 

to make an omelet?

Many men have 

risen to glory,

building empires

with armies behind them

with unlimited resources

all because they knew 


But eventually

the blood 



become too much

for some people

making brand new

hall monitors,


just plain ol’ RATS. 

A tip to all GRAVEDIGGERS: 

In the end,

the truth will come out

no matter how deep 

you bury it

in bullshit. 

There’s always going 

be a person with

a slingshot

taking on Giants

trying to seek


in an unfair world.


here is a toast

to all the rats 

of the world: 

May you have

the courage


the commitment 

to continually

to keep going back

to life’s mouse trap

consistently seeking 

the Real Truth.

Even though IT

might lead to your death

because snitches get stitches

but they always forget

about the ditches.




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Poetry Mondays – Meta Me by Ryan Fu



When did the online

version of me

become better than

the real me.

There’s something wrong

with the world 

when people want to hang out 

via Skype.

Where we spend half our lives

looking at nugget porn


grumpy cats

watching untalented people

making a fool of themselves

to extend their 15 mins of whoring.

Don’t I have enough pixels,

aren’t I better than HD quality? 

Didn’t I receive enough 

likes on my page?

How many followers do you need

to be consider someone to like? 

Fuck your LEFT


RIGHT swipe

The Oracle was right 

we’re all trapped 

in cyber purgatory 

permanently signed on

for whole world to judge

as our footsteps gets traced,




without us even knowing


consenting to it.

Building a case

that the real you



      the virtual you 

is much better

because they can

     control you.




the real me

will disappear 

into Matrix

leaving behind 

my digital footprint


my Google searches

for Carrot Top.




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Exclusive BLW Interview w/ The Walking Dead star, Chad Coleman tells us no secrets about the new season



The Reality of Reality Tv – Being on the Inside (An Interview with a Reality TV Producer)




Hmmm, how should I set this up? Do you watch TV? Do you watch “Reality” TV? If you are an American, odds are you do, and odds are is that you love it. Odds are also that you believe what you are watching is fact and not scripted. Well, take it from somebody who knows, 90% of Reality TV is scripted scenes performed by very bad actors. Yeah, yeah, you claim you already know this, but do you? Do you know the extent Reality Producers go to make their so-called “Reality”? No you don’t. I do, cause for 5 years I have been working on Reality TV crews. Now I cant tell you what department, or my gender cause for every gig, one must sign paperwork basically saying the production company can sue you if you make public what goes on set. I thought it was time I start to share some of my experiences to the public so at least they know what kind of garbage they are truly watching.


Lets start with a restoration car show I worked. You’ve seen these shows. Their is a shop ran by friends and families. They get clients who want to fix up an old classic car. Sounds simple enough, but that’s in real life, this is Reality TV. First off I discover that the business is not even owned and ran by who the show’s claims. Nope, the real owner is not even on screen. The producers found this shop (it is an actual restoration body shop) and put in their cast. Speaking of, the main cast knows very little about fixing up cars, but they are presented to have this knowledge. I get to the set and I notice some off screen workers fixing up the last details on this sick ass classic car. These workers stage seats in front of the vehicle, the producer calls over the camera crew and the cast. ACTION! With direction coming from the producer, our so called experienced body shop owners pick up the seats and place them in, then they talk about working all night, the vehicle is almost ready and that they are stressed out because the deadline is soon upon them. HA! Really?

 01 02

Let me explain this so-called deadline. For this episode one family member is giving another family member a surprise birthday gift- a fixed up classic car. Who wouldn’t want that? The gift will be delivered at a birthday party…Surprissseeee!!!! Ok, this sounded real to me. Until I found out that the two family members aren’t really related. In fact they have never met each other. The first time they will meet will be at the birthday. Can you say “casted”? That’s right, someway, somehow, the producers pulled these 2 people out of their asses. I was actually amazed cause up until the point I found out I believed it and thought the gift was very thoughtful. Shame on me.

03 04

I saved the best for last. At the shop the crew is packing up to go film the presentation of the car at the birthday party. The cast is getting in their cars and taking off. So I’m thinking how come they just don’t drive the gift over. Well that’s cause a tow truck drives in to take over the fixed up classic car. Was the tow truck being used cause they don’t want to damage or dirty the birthday gift….uhhh no. Its cause the classic car/birthday gift doesn’t even RUN….I just laughed. We all get in the van, and the tow truck does its thing. Once we arrive at the party, the people their are friends of our show’s cast and do not even know the two family members. No they are just there to look cool. The way the last scene was filmed was classic. Since the truck didn’t run, the producers had a problem…or did they?

In the front yard, the two fake family members were placed in the front yard. Down the street 2 of the show’s cast were placed in the classic car that didn’t run. Behind the car were a bunch of crewmembers ready to push. That’s right, push. I then observed the camera crew discuss how this scene was going to be show with tight shots, then a wide shot at a certain moment. After final discussions….ACTION!

05 06

With all their strengthen, the car was pushed and picked up momentum to the point it went slowly down the street by itself. The cameras stayed tight while the car was being pushed, then when the pushing crew let go and got out of the way, the shots went wide…beautiful I thought.

Inside the car the show’s cast were screaming and honking the horn, while on the front yard the two family members looked in amazement. The birthday casted family member put on a very surprised and happy face, and when the car pulled up and stopped right in front of them (a total accident), glee was felt through out the scene. What a gift!

 07 08

I’m not against Reality TV at all. What I am against is how it’s presented to the public as real or even documentary like. I wish they were just honest about it. Look at Tru TV’s show Operation Repo. In the beginning credits, in small font, it states actors are used on the show. The director decided to do this from day one because there is no other legal way to make a show. He got shit from his peers for this. They did not like the fact he was showing the public how Reality TV is really produced. Did it hurt the show? No way, it is one of the most successful Reality shows ever.


From time to time I will share my experiences so at least some of you will know that you are being played. Here’s a little teaser. A few years ago I was on the set of a big hit show, where the host got into a verbal argument with a guest. I thought it was real, the guest thought it was real…until cut was called. The guest went up to the host to apologize and make sure they were still cool. The host responds, “Ah, don’t worry, it’s only for the show”. 


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“Her” and our Self-Loathing Society (Review) By John D. Aguon


Ryan Fu: So, I recenty just watched “Her”, in which I was totally blown away. Many of my friends recommended the movie to me when it was actually in the theaters but I just thought it was other corny romantic flick, so I didn’t give it a chance. Until, a week ago it became available on cable, so I decided what the heck and boy, I was totally wrong about the movie. It was so much deeper than a simple love story. Here is our poignant but great review of Her by our writer John D. Aguon.

“Her” and our Self-Loathing Society


By John D. Aguon @lttlgnt

So a couple of nights ago, I took date night with my girlfriend to the cinema and saw Spike Jonze’s “Her”. I can’t help but find the irony, in that I took my girlfriend to see a movie about a man who falls in love with his OS (Operating System). Although the story could sound ridiculous to those anti-technology cynics, it’s hard not to imagine a world that seems not so farfetched. I’m going to admit, that if I had one of those pretentious Oscar votes, this would be my favorite film of the year by far! Also, If you’re not a fan of Joaquin Phoenix, I’m going to predict you’re going to slap the “I don’t like Joaquin Phoenix” version of yourself, the minute you walk out this film. Phoenix plays the hopeless Theodore Twombly, a writer who makes a living creating letters for other people who pay for personalized poetry and not too long after Jonze sets up Twombly to be so heartbroken after a recent divorce, the lonely Twombly buys his future girlfriend in the form of an OS charmingly names herself Samantha (voiced by Scarlett Johansson).


Now what if it were that easy? What if you were so alone that you needed someone to talk to and voila, $369 (+tax) and a $99 startup fee you have the future Mr or Mrs. You?! Let’s say your OS would be designed to your every need and you were completely happy with it, what would be so wrong with it? It doesn’t have to be romantic, it could be platonic, what would be so wrong? Here’s the deal, an OS so intuitive that it could tell when you’re having a bad day wouldn’t be so bad for you….but for your relationships, something like that would be basically death.


Let’s face it, I think I’m on my phone about twenty percent of the day…okay forty percent. Whether it’s googling the most googled words of 2013 , checking out if Peyton Manning scored enough points in my fantasy football league ( we all know he scores more than enough), or even instagramming some McDonalds. But I’m not alone here, and you know it. Our phones went from being connected to the wall to being connected to our hands in the matter of just fifteen years.


So, the future is coming and It won’t be long until we will be living alternate lives with our OS in whatever area has a good WiFi signal (Shout out to all the shitty starbucks wifi nationwide) It won’t be long for us to be bumping into one another because our heads our fixated facing down to our ultra-bright iPhone screens. Then soon after, life on earth would be a bunch of people walking around with virtual helmets that simulate whatever we want to imagine our world to look, smell, and feel like. The use of physical touch would be so obsolete and intricacies of conversations with another person would be mere fables.

As depressing as this sounds, artificial intelligence is growing rapidly and were seeing the tip of already with Siri. As brilliant as “Her” was, and I mean really brilliant, the film slapped me with a hard look at the reality of our self-loathing society. With technology growing to acclimate to your personal needs, were losing touch of what’s in front of us, the real emotions that make life worth living, not just your pseudo-life we live on Facebook.


With that being said, “Her” is an incredible film! It’s not just a film about a guy falling in love with his computer. It’s about the relationships we have in our lives. The performances are exceptional, with Joaquin Phoenix being my front runner for the best Actor award and Johansson really deserves some recognition, despite not showing her sexy self once on screen.  It’s extremely insightful and thought provoking. The visual aspect is amazing, as Jonze uses every aspect of film, from the music (scored by the eccentric Arcade Fire), to the colors, to the editing, and he places you in a futuristic world that seems just so introverted, so easy, so…human.


Check out John’s work @ Vimeo & Youtube

Her (plus bonus features!)

Check out our 2nd Podcast show – The Ebola Virus Show!!! w/Nasim Saleh



2nd Episode- The Ebola Virus Show



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Check out our 1st Online Show/Podcast for the Da Wheelhouse – Dating Sucks Balls

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1st Episode – Dating Sucks Balls



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