It’s been a long and busy day but I got a lot of great sets of famous people. I proceed on my way home when I get a tip for Batman. No, not the real one but the actor who played him. The tip was all the way on Sunset Blvd but I’ve never shot him before so I said what the hell, let’s go get Batman. So, I drive to Blvd of broken dreams.
When I get there the valet tells me he just got here 20 minutes ago and he seemed to be in a great mood. That was reassuring because I’ve never shot him before and it’s always different when you shoot someone new. You never know if they’re going to be cool with it or a total asshole. But I was a fan of all his movies and he seemed like a cool guy. I check my gear and proceed to get my target.
I look inside the restaurant which he was the only one inside with his son, laughing and having a good time. Looking at him, it seemed like he was a cool dude. So, I pull out my shit, pointing at him then I take my shot. I get a couple of frames off before he final notices me. I calmly put my shit away and give him the thumbs up. That’s how I personally say thank you for people I shoot even though it’s still a fucked up process of stalking and hunting.
I confidently start walking back to my car thinking about watching his latest flick when I get back to the house. All the sudden I see the valet with a concerned look on his face pointing behind me. It was Batman running after me on Sunset Blvd. Everything was in slow motion like in the movies but this Batman had a potty mouth.
“Hey, asshole,” Batman shouts to me.
I look around saying, “Me?”
“Yeah, dickhead. I didn’t come back from a long shoot from the East coast to deal with assholes fucking up my day with my son. You need to get the fuck out of here before I END YOUR WORLD. I fucken know people pal. They would end you in a heartbeat.”
Batman was in my face as I could smell spaghetti coming off his breathe as he berates me on Sunset Blvd with his saliva landing on my face with each word he shouts to me. I could see the valet around us looking as shocked as I was, seeing Batman losing his shit.
Before I get a word, he gives me a shoulder bump like if we were on the playing ground and I stole his lollipop. I started to chuckle a bit, which didn’t help the situation as I could see the veins in his eyes become blood-red. He calms himself down for a bit asking me,
“Are you going to leave?”
I take a step back saying,
“No. But I love you’re movies.”
He shakes his head in frustration and walks back to the restaurant. Before he walks in he takes one more look at me not as Batman but just another man wondering and thinking about the choices he made in his life. I stand firm not swaying my gaze as he gives me a nod, then he walks in. I pay the valet and all of them give me a high-five because they recognized I was in a fight.
I might have not won the battle but I think I got the respect from Batman.
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