Satanic Temple shows off their Goat-Headed statue in Detroit – How do you feel about it? Is it too much?

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According to Fox News, a crowd of several hundred gathered Saturday night to see Detroit’s newest resident: A 9-foot, 2,000-pound statue of a goat-headed occult idol named Baphomet.

The Satanic Temple unveiled the bronze figure to an estimated 700 attendees at an undisclosed location. The group’s initial venue canceled after local religious groups protested.

The group’s approach to secrecy with the second venue led to little opposition on Saturday, Director of the Detroit Satanic Temple chapter and national spokeswoman Jex Blackmore told Fox News.

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“Protesters arrived for a short time at our first ticketing location, but retreated after only about 30 minutes,” Blackmore said. “One woman attempted to block the event entrance and was removed by the police in cooperation with the building’s owner. “

The statue will now be stored out of public view until the Temple can find it a permanent home. The group hopes to display it at the Arkansas State Capitol, next to a monument of the Ten Commandments.

Photo Credit: Fox News

The Simpsons – Donut Hell

Animals are Better than Humans- They FAIL harder… (Dogs who fail at being dogs)

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Epic Fail of the Week – Woman Freaks out over Chicken McNuggets – Tell your mom to go home…

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According to the Associated Press in TOLEDO, Ohio — A security video from a McDonald’s in Ohio shows a woman punching two restaurant employees and smashing a drive-thru window because she couldn’t get Chicken McNuggets.

The tantrum caught on tape in Toledo earlier this year shows the customer reaching through the drive-thru window, slugging one worker and then another. She then grabs a bottle out of her car and tosses it through the glass window before speeding off.

It happened early on New Year’s Day. Police say Melodi Dushane was angry that McNuggets weren’t being served, because it was breakfast time.

Dushane says she was drunk at the time. She was sentenced to 60 days in jail last month and ordered to pay McDonald’s for the broken window.

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Happy National Junk Food Day!!! – What’s your favorite junk food?

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Each year on July 21st we observe National Junk Food Day.  This day is dedicated to the foods that everyone loves to snack on.  Junk food by definition are usually high in fats, sugars, salt and calories and contain very little nutritional value.

What kind of Junk Food do you like to eat?

Ours is Maple Bar with bacon from Voodoo Donuts

Can we Auto Correct Humanity? – Take Control or Be Controlled

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Epic Fail of the Week – Harry Potter as a Receptionist

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According to Nylon Magazine, a few weeks ago, Daniel Radcliffe stopped by the NYLON offices and sat at the front desk, unbeknownst to staffers and office visitors. The following was written by a NYLON employee, who wishes to remain anonymous. This is her tale.

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Animals are Better than Humans – They hate the Paparazzi – No Pictures Please

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The Bristol Post reports that photographer Bob Pitchford was simply trying to catch a snap of the gorilla chewing on some grass, but instead, he got the bird! 

While this photo may have just been very well-timed and nothing more, it’s hard to deny, as Bob told the paper, that the animal is a “bit cheesed off.”

“When I saw the pictures, I just thought ‘you little devil’,” Bob said.

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7 Days in Hell Review – Reasons why you need to watch this movie now!!!

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WRITTEN BY RYAN FU @FU_BEATZ

7 Days in Hell Review

Spoiler Alert – Andy Samberg does kill someone…kinda.

First off, congrats to Novak Djokovic for winning his third Wimbledon title and Serena Williams for dominating the women’s tennis game earning her 100th Wimbledon title or whatever it is because she’s just kicking everyone’s ass. That just happened last weekend, which a lot people watched these great athletes be the very best at their sport at a historic and timeless tournament called Wimbledon. Everyone knows that tennis is seen to be less aggressive than other sports, where finesse and agility is valued more than strength and power. The game of tennis is seen to be more of a classy and respectable sport to play just like the historic and strict Wimbledon tournament, where the players are expected to follow strict rules down to their all white uniforms and all players must show great manners because Wimbledon is seen to be the royalty of the tennis game, which sometimes actual royalty like the Queen of England checks out the games. So, when I saw the trailers of 7 days of Hell starring Andy Samberg and Kit Harington, I had to see the HBO made for tv movie because it fucking breaks not also all the tennis rules and all the rules in general. Here are the reasons why you need to see this shit immediately.

  • Andy Samberg, who plays Aaron Williams the adopted brother of Serena and Venus Williams. He is an absolute maniac with his button down sleeveless Jordache tennis attire. He’s literally from the streets. He does all the drugs and bangs all the girls & guys he wants too, plus he fucking killed a man during a tennis match. This might be the best performance I’ve ever seen from Samberg, plus that “Fuck Tennis 4 Ever,” tattoo is fucking amazing.
  • Kit Harington, who is primarily known from the acclaimed fantasy drama, Game of Thrones, plays the very serious Jon Snow. It’s simply amazing to watch him playing someone funny or at least a character, who is totally ridiculous that he is laughable in every scene. He plays Charles Poole, a young tennis prodigy that has a child’s brain that’s been damaged. To see Harington go all out putting himself out there trying to funny was so great.
  • The chemistry between Samberg and Harington is comedy gold. It was like watching two drunk infants fight. They were both willing to anything to get a laugh. And I mean anything.
  • The color commentary was hysterical as well with the likes of Serena Williams, David Copperfield, Chris Evert, John McEnroe and Jim Lampley.

If you are still not impressed by the reasons I’ve given on why you should watch 7 Days of Hell? Well, I thought the best part of the movie was the banter between Harington and the Queen of England was too fucking much. It’s just a ridiculous and fun movie to watch. Plus, if you ever played competitive tennis before like I did, I always wanted to do all the things that the characters did in the movie but I would have gotten in trouble for it. Also, if you aren’t a tennis fan at all, I think it’s still a great movie to watch and maybe it will turn you into a fan of tennis or at least a fan of denim button down sleeveless jackets.

Fu’s Observations:

  • Air Guitar – Everyone has done that with their tennis racquet after every point.
  • The Reverse Blindside
  • Aaron Williams lost 1996 Wimbledon & killed a man.
  • I loved Aaron ‘s under wear line A- Willi, Sac Flop
  • The Digital Orgy was amazing
  • Cocaine in his water bottle. How come I never thought of that?
  • Jim Lampley, “I hate watching tennis.”
  • Poole feeling the pressure, ode to the Blair Witch
  • “Sometimes my dick is a fucking dick.”
  • “I’ve seen too many too many dead bodies on the tennis court.”
  • The Queen of England voice messages were hysterical – “Fuck nut. Stupid Fuck Slut, don’t let us down anymore. I’ve been drinking.”

RYAN FU

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Epic Fail of the Week- Naked Man causes traffic delays on Interstate 95 – How angry would you be? What would you do if you saw this? (Warning: Nude Images)

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WEST HAVEN (AP) — State police say traffic was snarled during part of the morning rush hour on Interstate 95 in West Haven because of a naked man on the highway.

State police say they responded to a call for a medical assist on the southbound side of the highway near exit 42 at about 8:30 a.m. on Tuesday.

Police tell WVIT-TV they found the naked man sitting on his car by the side of the interstate.

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Police blocked off the highway for a time and traffic was only getting by on the right shoulder.

Police say the man was taken into custody and was expected to be transported to a medical facility for evaluation.

How angry would you be? What would you do if you saw this? How many times would you honk at the dude?

Photo Credit: (WTNH / Report-It / TDebrizzi)

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Fear and Loathing in Sea World Part 2 by Ryan Fu (The Hated Ones)

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As potheads we were starting to feel paranoid that security was watching us so we decided to see a show and maybe I could pull myself together. We check out the penguin and otter show, sitting at the back of the show on the top steps trying to avoid other people but apparently the show is really popular as it quickly fills up with kids and adults. Before the show starts the boys tell me to drink as much water to get me out of this funk I was in but I knew there was no way out of this hell except to ride it out.

Everyone was having a good time as the show started. But for myself was just trying to keep it together, but I was nowhere near in a good place because I was getting sicker and sicker.

Then, I looked up at the show staring at the otter performing on stage. The otter stopped whatever he was doing and started talking to me.

“Duuudddee, you are fucked up,” as the otter tells me in his cute little costume.

“You’re not going to make it.”

At the really strange moment, Hoover turns to me to ask me if I was alright. Then the floodgates opened up as I started to throw up chunks of my lasagna right in front of my feet as people tried to move away. Thankful, I didn’t hit anyone with my projectile vomit.

The sound I made while I was vomiting was so vile, it echoed throughout the show as it literally cleared the rows in front and behind us. The show finally ended as I sat in my own pool of lasagna vomit with my head in hands feeling awful. The boys quickly decided to take me out of the park, which it was amazing I even got back to the car because it’s a fucking maze when you’re high as a kite trying to get out of an amusement park. I mean is it that hard to put up big ass exit signs for stoners.

We finally got back to the car but I was even sicker. Before getting into the car I threw up some more near the car but we parked so close to the park near a roller coaster, which every time the kids went down the ramp, I unwittingly threw up simultaneously making the boys laugh hysterically.

 

I finally climbed into the truck to sleep it off but the boys decided it to light another one up before they got back into the park. They finished the J leaving me to my misery in the car. They left a couple of windows down so I could get some fresh air, but the stank from the cush we were smoking so smelly it attracted an uncover cop and Sea World security.

I hear a knock on my window, where I laid my head down seeing see a police badge.

I calmly stumble out of the car as the UC asks me if was alright. I tell him that I was cool leaning against the car because I couldn’t stand up straight. The UC smells the pot as security starts rummaging through car finding Mullen’s bag full of goodies. The UC asks me if this was mine and I tell him it wasn’t, which was the truth. But I was starting to notice he was getting angry and he wanted the rest of the boys to come back to the car, which I did calling them back to the car. I stumbled back into the car to sit down because the UC finally noticed that I couldn’t stand up anymore. As I sat there, I could hear them outside making jokes like, “Jesus, what did this dude eat?” 

In the corner of my eye see Mullen but not Angello. Mullen walks directly to the UC as the he points to his bag asking if it was his, which Mullen said it was his showing him his medical card. The cop tells Mullen that I got into his bag and started doing drugs, which Mullen started to point to me telling me,

“Bad Fu. How could you do that? You know you shouldn’t do that,” like was a dog that ripped up his favorite newspaper.

The UC gives back Mullen his bag telling him that we need to leave the park or get arrested. So, we decided to get out of Dodge as the cop tells me that was I banned from Sea World but the only thing I was worried about was potential throwing up in my own truck. We pull out of Sea World picking up

Angello outside the park. “Bro, what happened,” a worried Angello asks.

“We can’t go back into the park or we’ll get arrested and Fu is banned forever,” nonchalantly tells Angello lighting up other dobbie before leaving the park.

“That’s fucked up, I didn’t get to fuck any dolphins,” as Angello takes a puff on the joint.

As we were leaving Sea World, I could see another otter show going on, looking up seeing the same otter waving goodbye to me as I fall asleep in my drug induce coma.

I wake up in a hotel room, where the guys were walking in telling me they were shocked I was still alive, asking me if I wanted to some grab dinner to which I responded,

“Sure, I’m fucking starving I can eat an Otter. Anything but fish because that’s fucked up.”

That was the last time, I went to Sea World but it wasn’t the last time that I ate fish because I am Asian for fuck sake, I grew up on sardines and SPAM.

Check out Part 1 Fear & Loathing in Sea World

Photo Credit: San Diego Times

RYAN FU

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